2014

2014 has passed way too quickly. I feel like it wasn’t long ago that I was celebrating 2014 and maybe making some not great decisions. Nothing horrible or permanent, for the record.

Going into a new year always makes me think about how much can change in a year. It’s a little terrifying actually. Even writing this post is a little scary for me. 2014 was not an easy year for me, but it was a good one.

I went to Florida for the first time with one of my best friends, I found out I was going to Scotland, I went to Comic Con and cosplayed for the first time, I found an incredible job, I did well in school, and I even filmed a movie!

All of these are amazing, incredible things and I am so happy and grateful for each and every one. But there are some things in 2014 I am not ready to leave behind.

I’ve never really thought so much about a new year before, and I don’t know if this is because I am getting older, or because this year a lot of good things started and finished within the year and leaving 2014 sort of feels like I am leaving all those things forever.

I learnt a lot of things in 2014. I learned that I cannot change someone, no matter how hard I try. I sort of already knew this, but I think I was hoping that somehow, people would do what I wanted them to do, and act how I wanted them to act. It may have taken me almost the entire year, but I learned that I can accept people for not always being exactly what I want them to be, and a great thing can come from it. I also learned the hard way that trying to force somebody into being something their not (like more outgoing and sensitive… just as an example of course..) can lead to a really unhealthy relationship.

I am learning to be more assertive in what I want. This is sort of cheating, because I feel like I’ve been doing this more and more for a few years now, but it has really become prominent in the past couple weeks for me. In Ottawa I am kind of forced to make my own decisions, and I have my friends to help if I need, but it comes down to me and I don’t really have to discuss my needs/wants with anyone else and take their opinions into consideration, but back home it’s different. I feel like there is a lot more compromise happening and I am having to take a stand and say this is what I want, this is what I am willing to give etc.

I learned a lot about my friends this year. The ones I can count on, the ones I can turn to when I have a bad day and the ones that are really just around for a good time. I love all of them in their own way and I am happy that all of them are in my entire life. My friends threw a Christmas party before we all left for the holidays and they referred to all of us as a family. I usually refer to my roommates and I as a small family, but it never really hit me that my family in Ottawa extends past my 2 lovely, beautiful, fantastic roommates.

Overall this has a been a good year. I cannot wait to move into 2015 and make it an even better year.

Happy New Year!